A New Friend- this is a MUST READ!

So I have the funniest story EVER! I’ll try to keep it short. During my morning run this morning, I saw a neighbor out walking in front of her house. I said hello each time I passed her. I thought at the end of my run, “I’ll stop a little early and ask her if she wants to walk with me during my cool down.” So she joined me and was excited, you could tell. Oh yes, and keep in mind this woman has some kind of problems and I am pretty sure she has some mental retardation. So we walked and chatted for a few laps. This was all over by 7:15 AM- keep in mind.

I took my kids swimming with some friends from the ward at our neighborhood pool at about 9 AM and came home about 11:00 to Tyler (he didn’t have school today). He reported that the “friend” I met this morning had come over twice. Once to ask Tyler take the lid off of a bucket she had (which was full of dog poop and rocks), and the next time she asked for soda and then cookies (which are never found in my house… well, not the kind of cookies she would’ve been looking for anyway). Tyler told her we didn’t have either, to which she replied, “Well what do you have?” He told her we had cereal and fruit. She asked if we had water and then asked for some when Tyler told her yes. So he had given her a bottle of water and off she went.

So one of my friends from the ward was over and we had been back from swimming for about ½ hour. Knock, knock! Guess who was stopping by again? LISA! She had her dog this time and asked if she could come to visit. She came inside and asked if she could put her dog down. I politely told her that our housing contract says no animals are allowed, but that she could put her dog in the backyard. After she encouraged her dog to go to the bathroom in the backyard, Tyler asked her to bring the dog back in since he was painting back there and didn’t want urine or poop in the yard. So, after another 20 or so minutes of her playing her harmonica in the background and a little bit of chatting, she got up to leave with her Bible, harmonica, and dog. I was relieved and said, “thanks for coming. See you later,” to which she said, “well, I’ll probably be back. I’m just bringing my dog home.” I could not stop laughing when she left. I couldn’t believe she had been over 3 times in a matter of a few hours of meeting her!

Anyway, I left around 1:30 PM to run errands with a friend. I got home around 3:30 and Tyler reported that Lisa had come over FOUR TIMES! OH MY GOSH! He didn’t answer the door while I was gone, so she kept stopping by every ½ hour. I was laughing so hard. As I’m talking about it (I had been home maybe 5 minutes), she knocked on the door! I wasn’t going to answer, but Tyler informed me that I had left the garage door OPEN! DANGIT! So I answered the door and she asked if she could come visit. I told her politely that she had already come to visit that day. She then asked me for something cold to drink and held her empty glass up. I filled up her glass, told her to have a good weekend, and shut the door.

WHAT DO I DO????? I don’t want to be rude and I want to be nice and befriend her. She stays home alone during the day apparently. She said her sister was at work and her neice at school, so she was home with the dog. So no wonder she came over! She’s at home alone all day long with a dog! But 8 times in a matter of 8 hours is WAY OVER MY LIMIT! I am debating if she continues over the next day or two, to nicely tell her that she can only come over once per week or something like that. I was so overwhelmed, but thought it was too funny. I had to share this story. But if anyone has any advice, please, do comment!